When They Win the War on Christmas

from Magnum Opus (not finished) by Meet The Squidables

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lyrics

His pickup truck is lost, a wooden wheel sits in his yard
His beautiful cousin loves him despite their oldest being at the bar
Where's their Christmas presents? Where's their Christmas Tree?
How's Santa gonna find 'em without a chimney?

Driving back from town on his tractor on a lonesome gravel road
He's suffering with Farm Aids out in this Midwestern cold
They believe that corn's enough to feed a happy home
But they're so dumb they don't even know it's Christmas

In this simple home you'll find no trace of a baby Jesus
All his youngest younguns have to drink Bud Light for breakfast
It might help them grow some chest hair, it's just so goddanged early
Drunk, throwing up, clueless it's Christmas morning

Some say there's no heart left in the Heartland.
But if that's true, then why ain't there no smarts then?
Cuz if you think about it there ought to be some balance
They're still white, so they deserve Christmas
We're still white, so we deserve some Christmas
There's no need to fight with other whites at Christmas
Baby Jesus was white when he invented Christmas
You should go drive around, look at holiday lights at Christmas
There's a reason why Bing Crosby sung "White Christmas"
I ain't a racist, I had a black friend once, but come on, it's Christmas

credits

from Magnum Opus (not finished), track released December 23, 2017
Jacob, Nick

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Meet The Squidables Grinnell, Iowa

Nick and Jacob.

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